150 DAYS MORE...
the countdown has begun... i've done the obligatory registration and angkat sumpah.. i'm soooo happy everything went pretty smoothly except for the panic attack i had a an hour before i get to ROMM that i'd like to share with you peeps...

see?.. this kiasu couple wanna make sure that we got our desired tok kadi, date and time w/o any fuss!... so, as decided by the groom-to-be, i was to log in to the net and register online at the stroke of midnight... and so, the ever so kiasu bride-to-be willingly obeyed her husband-to-be but of course, always being paranoid abt "midnite" she watched Amazing Race first before logging in...

After wat seemed like an endless erray of blanks to fill in, got to the part where she had to book their desired kadi, date and time... and wat horror, she had! - there wasn't any time to select!!!.... so, she waited for a half an hour.. thinking that system is down or it's juz that suay "stroke-of-midnite" thingie... half hour later, still no luck... another half hour later, again no luck! so, she decided that she'll try again first thing in the morning...

tried.. and tried she did - in between chatting on MSN, helping mom with layering her kek lapis and baking her cookies... still NO time to select up till the last min... on the way to ROMM, she kept thinking of the "WHAT IFS"?... and the officer on duty wasn't helping either when she said "hmmm... u've got to call the kadi coz it may be that he forgot to open up his time-slots OR he's not taking anyone on that day"... oh!.. thanks sister!!!.... tat really helped calm the bride's nerves!...

so anyways, in the end, we called the kadi and asked and phew!... it was the first reason dah!... so, to ALL couples-registering-to-be, pls take note of this.. call the kadi first before deciding on another one or changing dates!... ;)

i consider ourselves darn lucky to have gotten everything we had desired!... if it had not been that slip up, who knows?... the whole wedding prog for Sat, may have to change - YET AGAIN!... :p

another 150days
appx 5 more months...
i'm gonna be sharing my life - in it's entirety
on our 7yrs anniversary (as we'd planned, rite when we first started out)
with my FIRST boyfriend
my bestest-friend
my 1 and ONLY dearest..

a union we both have been anticipating since 7yrs ago
when you "pop" the question and i said YES under the stars
tucked away in the corner of marina promenade beside the then construction of Esplanade.

oooooh..... i can't wait!!!!

PONDER... PONDER...
Dearest's nenek is getting "weirder" by the day... and we're thinking it's "time".... and i pray that it's soon coz i juz cannot stand looking at the old woman looking so frail and so sickly... this morning, for no apparent reason, she suddenly couldn't talk!.. she was juz murmuring and laying down.. until sometime after subuh..

and the worst thing was, dearest saw her "pushing" away "something".. he tot he was disturbing her.. but apparently, NOT! when dearest ask her, she murmured something like "Stop pressing my lips"... hmmmm... i read somewhere that the first signs of death is some sort of pulsing or something of the kind somewhere on your body and it goes higher and higher up till the day you die.. something like that... so, that kinda reaffirms that it's "abt time".... PLUS, she's oredi like reminding (kasi pesan) dearest's mom on somethings....

i really hate it when i get to see someone so old, looking so fragile and sickly.. it always someway, make me wonder how i'd be in the future, when i'm at that age - like will i be thin and sickly or will I stay chubby, cute and bubbly healthy like my nyayi today? if the kind of death is hereditary like cancer... then, i'd sure wanna die like the rest of my nyayi's siblings - ASAP!... eg the latest sister who died, she was healthy when she suddenly fell in the toilet. went into coma and died peacefully in her sleep within like 2-4 days.. i think i'd rather wanna die tat way then have to suffer a decade before you "peacefully" die, surrounded by your loved ones... and i've always like the idea or more of hoping being in deep sleep if i were have to die in an accident or some terrorist attack!.. so that i will not have to live through the pain and be in torture!... in other words, i'd rather have a gun shot through my head w/o me knowing, than slit my wrists and bleed to death!...

i guess that's one of the reasons why God made it such a way that one won't know when one is dying.. this excludes the doctors' prediction when they tell you, "You only have 6mths to live"... they can only predict.. but they will still not able to tell you exactly when you'll die.. and most often than not, you will, by sheer of will, able to surpass the "deadline" given.

hmmm.. this topic's too depressing.. i would definitely lurvvve to complain abt my day - my beautiful day, turne out to be filled with "irritants"!.. but i'm feeling pretty disturbed by this at the moment.. so, i shall keep those complaints until the "irritants" come out to "play" again!

MODEL NAIMA
woooooo!... finale of America's Next Top Model last nite was such a killer... and as expected, very frustrating coz watching it - knowing who won *thanks to a certain someone* - is like getting your hair pulled... if ONLY i hadn't known who had won, i'd be like sooooooo at the edge of my seat coz the top 2 are my favourites!... and watching last nite, i'd really love for Kahlen to win it of course!...

But looking at Kahlen, she can only be a "picture" model... i can't see her making it BIG on screen, being a spokesperson for something and having a vivacious personality to make it in the modeling industry.. she's juz a shy, plain jane who's darn photogenic and know how to "play" with the camera.... lovely Kahlen... i'm sooooo waiting for your first ad!!....

Naima, on the other hand has this somewhat aura that make you wanna be her.. her confidence, her strut and her presence... and last nite's runway was a total "chilling" experience watching her strut her thang!... she really work it!... she looked soooooo PRO!.. and Kahlen look soooooo amateur beside her.. btw, i love Kahlen to bits but last nite's strut, sista, ain't working it for me!... u look like u were gonna fall anytime soon!... but wateva it is, Naima, i think u should go back to being a Mohawk!... u rawk with that hairstyle.. u look more edgy... last nite's subdued, flat hair juz ain't u!...

howell... am looking forward to next season's top model... i really hope TCS 5 would "catch up" with the US... show it abt the same time with the US or something so that a repeat of this season's "blunder" will NOT happen again!.... plsssssssssss???

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DARLINGSSSS!!!!!....

Sorry eh... i forgot to msg u peepz on your bdays! ;)

but nonetheless - to happy, happy years ahead!

May you girls be blessed with good health and long, prosperous life..

oooooh... can't wait for the 2 baby boys to "pop"!...

Ms GEMSssss...

THANK YOUUUUU....

for the delicious spread you made with your bare hands last nite!!!...

Ms Nasty & RosmAman...

Thank YOUUUUU...

for the wonderful company!!!!

it's been a while since we last dish out our cams and shoot ourselves eh??...

ok.. RAYA lah...hehhehee...

this yr raya have to be a quickie.. will be gone in 2 wks after raya!.. brrrr...

must make plans!... make plans!.. ;)

AMAZING RACE IN ASIA?!!!
oh my gawd!.. soooo inspired by RosmAman's latest entry.. i went to check it out myself!.. and my oh my!... ;D it definitely brought a big grin to my silly face!!!....

Dearest, can we join?... plssss??... plssss???... plssss???..... hmmmm... maybe not for the first one lah... since it may coincide with our wedding.. but if they have a second one, we'll join - can??..... no need honeymoon liao!.. hahahahhaa.....

hmmmm.. if dearest dun want, Ms Quirky, u want???..... we join together!!!..... u very good at moving around and u can eat anything "nonsense".. i can drive.. u navigate!.. then, i promise i'll work out to be as fit as YOU!... :D

MY STRENGTHS?

Y is it that ...

others can see my strengths more than i can see them myself?

after 4yrs here, i still cannot take compliments very well?

others seemed to have more faith in my abilities than i have for myself?

These were the questions I asked myself after the review I had with my superiors.. It was a pleasantly surprising experience.. a very motivating one at that!... wat they had to say abt me, was totally "uncalled for" - in a good way of course.. but i realised tat after 6 appraisals done over the years here, i'm still not capable to "feel good" whenever i'm being complimented!.. HAH!.. like i'll get all squirmy inside and going "awwww! stop it!... dun wanna hear.. dun wanna hear..".. and i think that i've got the most pathetic reaction of all!... i mean, ppl would def be elated and happy, rite after being praised and all?.. but i think i went blank.... u know that kinda blank look... giler ke, aku nie??..

I was told - "To be a good leader, one must put personal differences aside".. they think i'm capable to be a leader.. but to be a good one, i cannot have this personal difference with "others" read: Ms Taik.. hmmmm.... so now, the question i ask myself is - would i RATHER be a good leader and "live" in hypocrisy or would i rather NOT be one and live with my integrity?..

pondering... pondering... i do talk to this person but only on official matters.. tat's wat counts rite?... hmmm.... howell.. wateva lah... i'll think abt this when the time comes.. as long as the line is clearly drawn between me and her, tat's all tat matters... at the most, there's always the email and the paper to communicate!.. :p

INTERESTING FACTS
1. A research was done to see what kind of men (physical traits) would attract a women when she is ovulating. The group was divided in half - half ovulating and half not. Interestingly, women who were ovulating prefers men who look more masculine while those who were not, prefers a more feminine-looking man. In this instance, men who has softer features..

2. Woman who cheats tend to do so during the first 4days of ovulation.

3. Men have bigger testicles than gorillas but smaller ones than chimpanzees. Y?? Because female gorillas are more faithful. The male ones need not be worried in not having an off-spring of their own. Female chimpanzees are very unfaithful hence male chimpanzees need to ejaculate more in hope of getting his own offsprings. And because women in general are neither that faithful nor very unfaithful, hence men has testicles the size of somewhere between a gorilla's and a chimpanzee's....

adapted from Human Desires, Discovery Channel

i can't quite remember the title name but it got aired last nite, at 8.30pm.

LAZY BONES
woah!... i'm like sooooo lazzzzzyyyy..... i think it's the rain on Sunday... since then, been feeling soooo lethargic, everytime i close my eyes, i could actually doze off.. brrrrr....

anyways, something really farny happened in the office.. Mat Slacker of the office, fell flat on his bum not once but TWICE within a space of 30mins!.. hahahaha..tat was sooooo hilarious!!... at the same time, it's soooo riduculous how the chairs are soooo faulty that they could actually break!... i actually got very upset coz one of it was my chair and Mat Slacker "graciously" took the rap for me since i quickly swap my chair after hearing the unmistakable "breaking" noises it was making..

But anyways, it's juz not right to give us faulty chairs!.... wat if the person who was sitting on it was pregnant or something?... she could have hurt herself!... and worst of all, this annoying ADT went "u too FAT lah! too FAT lah!... go and diet!".. (i wish i had recorded ADT's voice to let you hear how irritating it is!) oh my gawd!...i swear, if it was me who had fallen the second time, and gotten terribly, terribly upset, i'd give ADT some bitch slapping!...

*yawn* gosh!.. yawning away.. brrrr.... very cold and very sleepy here in the office!... and ooooh!.. juz gotten my sup's reply on my appraisal report.. oh dear!.. it's red practically everywhere!... more amendments to be made?!.... alamak!... and she wants to know every achievements for ALL my work done?!.. double alamak!.. some of it, really no achievement leh - it's brainless work!.. wat achievement(s)??... Ms Quirky!.. help me!!..... :(

WET! WET! DAY!...
It's been raining the whole day today!... and it's making me sooooooooo damn lazy to do ANYTHING!... mom's asked if i'd like to go to granny's hse.. but neh... too lazy to walk out of the hse....

luckily, i went out with dearest yesterday instead of today!... wouldn't have been able to, even if we wanted to!.... brrrr..... and ooooooh... we collected his ring!.... and ooooh laaaa laaaa.... i can't believe it myself!.. i've bought 3 shoes - 2 a few days back and 1 juz yesterday - this (half) month alone!.. and i've still got like another brand-new pair in the closet!!.... milia!... what have u DONE??!!....

u see.. retailers.. are very smart!... up to 50% discount sale! poster was sooooo huge... and u can't possibly NOT wanna go in, now, would u??... no intention to buy, of course.. juz to look-see, look-see..... but alas!... who would have guess? *smirks*.. i went out with 2 pairs! - it would have been 3 but my head took control - though not really.. coz the pair that i left w/o was on sale! while the other 2 that i left with was NOT!

And then, yesterday, while waiting for the girl to engrave the ring, we jalan2 and stopped by VNC.. and gatal-me juz feel like trying on this pair of lovely, lovely shoes, which i was sure as hell would look damn good in any pair of jeans!.. and goodness gracious!.. ta-da!.. i left with that pair rite there and then!... now, now... dun blame me... tell me. who engraves a ring for 1hr??!.. tat sure took a whole lot of time!....

ooooh... sooooo cold and lonely now... the hse is empty.. and so is my stomach!.. i shall call up McDonalds now, order my burger and sundae (hah! like it's not cold enuff!) and watch my Veer Zaara and open the flood gates to top of this wet, wet, Sunday!... ;)

JUDGEMENT DAY...
It's that time oredi!!.... 6mths?.. soooo soon?.... brrrr.... have to do my confirmation appraisal liao.. oh my gawd!... i hate doing this!... y??.... coz i really dunno wat to say!.. how to describe wat i do?.. how do i "sell" myself w/o looking arrogant or action bagus?... oh dear!...

luckily, they're still using the old form!... i cannot imagine doing the new form!.... y can't we have boxes we can tick?.. simple questions to complete?... does an appraisal really have to be sooooo darn difficult?.. does anyone actually read those stuff we wrote, besides the sup?.. or is this another wasted paper exercise we have to go through, for the sake having more papers, more files on the desk, to make it look like we're working?.... brrrrr.....

my deadline is drawing near.. and of ALL the time in the year to have deadlines to meet, it has to be now!!!... coz the sickening thing is, all the deadlines are squeezed at around the same time coz of the major game that's looming next mth!... ooooh!... sooooo not looking forward to that!... the security issues we heard... i hope there won't be another case of the JB incident!... tat'll be nitemarish!.. but i guess Ms Quirky and I have sorta have "something" to do!.. hahahaha.. now, i feel like having a laptop so that i can bring over and play with it!!...

speaking of which, Ms Insurance Agent: i still haven't gotten your email on the travel insurance info lah!... u can condemn your email provider, i tell ya!... maybe i should invite you to Gmail instead!!.... hahahaha...

MOVING...
It seemed like it's been a while since I last updated my bloggy... hmmm... been sooooo darn tired at work... and my weekend was busy cleaning up my room!.... oh!.. btw, project R is taking place... and I'm darn happy abt it!... hahaa.. alas!....

My one and ONLY room took me the damn day to clear... and that only took care of the numerous toys, dolls and photo frames i had and some other stuffs that i'm bringing along with me...

Now, watching tv is soooo loud and clear and sleeping in feels like I'm in a freezer!... brrrrr..... And i cannot believe the no. of photo frames i'm bringing along with me!.. ahhaha!.... and the no. of dolls i've collected!!.... but i'm not giving away my dolls!.. ahhaha... But a collection of snoopy "dolls" - you know, the one that McDonalds gave away or sold? a few years back?.... yeah.. and also small beanies of Snow White's dwarves, some Sesame street and Disney World characters beanies... anyone wants??... I'm also considering giving away or maybe sell off Hello Kitty and Hello Daniel soft toy... i've got 2 of it that i wish to give away.. but like very sayang leh... hmmmm.... but if anyone wants it, juz let me know yah?... i think i shall consider having a garage sale!.. mmmmm.....

I guess i'll be putting up pictures of the stuffs that i wanna give away or sell off.... hmmm... teeny-weeny bit of money, also can lah hor?.... can use the extra teeny-weeny moolahs for my savings??... hehehhee.... speaking of pix, i freakin LOST my XD card!... my 256MB (or was it 512MB?) XD card!... damn it!... been bringing around my cam w/o realising there's no card inside!.... searched everywhere.. cleared my desk at work, at home.. zilch!... sooooo frustrating!... raya's coming and NO card???!!!.... aaaaaahhh!!... expensive plak tu!!..... boooo-hooooo!...

BESLAN SIEGE
i was sooooo outraged when I watch the show yest on Discovery Channel!... i didn't have to watch the whole thing to get it all figured out.. but it was sooooo damn gruesome coz they've got like the real footages of the siege itself!... Remember the incident in Russia where some terrorists held school children and their parents hostage in school for 3 days!..

all the while watching the show, i was silently praying for the kids and the babies.. tears juz flowed watching the interview of the few kids who survived the ordeal.. one as young as 6yrs old!.. mothers lost their their children, husbands shot, siblings lost, babies died, no water and only stinking air to breathe for 3 whole days!.. one 8yr old recounted the time when she had to drink someone's urine out of a handkerchief!.. oh my GOD!!... wat cruelty!... i couldn't imagine if that was MY child!...

at the end of it all, 350 or so died.. out of which 180+ children died!.... that's like 2/3 of the dead!... and they had to practically dig a field to bury all these corpse.. out of the dead, 31 were identified terrorists and 1 was found hiding under a truck and immediately taken to publicise his shameless face and to inform wat really happened and all...

I dunno what kind of terrorists these are.. but i cannot imagine what kind of human would target a child?.... not juz ONE but 1000+ children incl babies!.... they were innocent and their future, as well as the country's future was snatched away... wat lures them? - greed? attention? power? i dunno...

the world may be coming to an end.. the signs are visible.. a few more left to go and...

the end...

1000 CARDS??!
isn't printing 1000 cards equivalent to appx 2000pax??!... *rolls eyes*

tell me.
1. where do all these ppl come from?
the whole block? the whole estate?! Tom, Dick and Harry met on the streets?

2. y are we inviting ppl that are actually not within the immediate family eg uncle's wife's relatives or vice-versa. Another classic eg: gives card to A. A ask, "Can give me a few more cards? I wish to invite so and so and so to the wedding too."
HUH??!!!.... is it YOUR wedding or MINE?!...

3. why do we have to put a loooooong list of "Turut Mengundang" (read: these are the ppl inviting as well. N mind you! not juz the impt ppl are gonna be listed. Ppl tat has NO involvement in our wedding are also in this list!) in our cards if the ONLY reason is so that the people who were invited would recognise the person under this list?!
if the person invited don't recognise the tuan/puan rumah why the hell are we inviting in the first place?!.. Now, tell me - where is the freakin rationale or logic behind this old doing?

4. where on earth are we going to fork out double the cash for printing cards, food and favours? do we look like we print money for a leaving? or do we look like genies that money actually comes rolling in with a click of the fingers?

this is really cobaan... cobaan... !! trying to calm down.. shhhhhh........

conclusion: only 500 cards will be printed. full-stop. any others that "needs" to be invited, will be given the pre-made, A4, fold-urself cards available at Geylang!

1000 freakin cards?!???!!!........
i'm not even at my own wedding yet and i can barely breathe - the faces to remember(?), the noise, the heat! i may have to request for a fan at the top of the dais, instead of chandeliers hanging above us! - dun wanna look roasted like a pig or be put on a life-support system juz bcoz there is juz too much peeps to "entertain" the whole day!!!...

Ya Allah! Pls help us go through this stage of preparation.

The challenges kept getting tougher as D day keeps getting nearer..

Give us the strength and patience

to forge ahead in the "battle-field" that awaits..

amin..

STRESSED??
Before the start of Ramadhan, i shall write this in TODAY, before midnite!..

i went to do my facial yesterday and got a shock of my life!... my beautician told me that my face is in a "very bad state" and it was "the worst state that she had ever done for me" since I started going to her!... wahlau!... can cry siah!....

anyways, thank god i went to her early!... i knew that my face has been giving me loads of problem coz of all the zits that's been popping out of nowhere!... she asked if i'm stressed - abt the wedding, perhaps?... NOOOOOO.... i think it's more of WORK!....

my desk is sooooo blardy messy that i juz couldn't take it anymore!.. I juz HAD to bloody clean it before i can do anymore work!... i spent half the morning cleaning my desk - throwing all the papers that i had lying on the table and i juz realised how much trees i had cut becoz of IOC!.. the shredder jammed on me 3x coz i was too impatient to put a teeny weeny amt of paper each time!.. and after ALL THAT time cleaning my desk.. at the end of the day, i still leave with a messy desk!!... brrrrr.... but at least, this time there's not a speck of desk!... haha..

oooooh!... really.. i can choke, drown, gag in this very messy process!!.... i wished i had taken over only like next year!... i juz feel that it's not fair that i was asked to take over NOW and be expected to think up of a new process, do a review (not 1 but 3 freakin programs, mind you!) and present my so-called findings and recommendations WHILE still clearing up the mess that someone's leave behind... which i can't say is entirely that person's fault coz there is a reason why this had been drifting along over the years!...

The past few days have made me feel less of an "Exec" but more and more like an SE... nooooo... not Senior Exec!... a Shit Exterminator!! brrrrr....

yeah.. yeah.. i admit... i'm such a freakin whiner!... but i ain't all negative lah... i definitely prefer doing wat i'm doing now, than having to go back to where i was 2yrs ago!.. ain't going back there no more! at least now it's more challenging and stimulating for my nearly dead brain.. i juz hope to God that my faith and my patience is not so tested from tomorrow onwards.. i don't wish to go "F@#*" here and there - everywhere - the entire day juz bcoz some "smarty pants" juz coudn't get it in their thick fucking skull that some things juz CANNOT be done!... and some things are best to be followed for better or worst - coz that's the fucking system, damn it!!!!! if i could make it better for EVERYBODY, of course i would!.. but FUCK!.. i'm not GOD!.. i can't think up of something and *ting!* everything is better than before - simpler even!!.. plssssss!!!.... even God would shake his head! there must be a balance and not everything is a bed of roses!... and not everything stays the same like 20yrs ago!.. for eg, ever look at yourself in the mirror??....

there's fucking changes everywhere!... grow up and OUT of the bubble and learn to accept the changing environment!... like i said, life's been too good "there" that everyone gets too comfortable that even their brains froze over the years of inactivity, perhaps!...

Oh!.. god!... i've gone "fucking" again!.. ok.. should stop here before another F-word is uttered!!... tomorrow is the start of fasting - a period of abstinence!... abstinence from everything including uttering vulgarities!... so, i promise - i'll try very, very hard NOT to write anymore blasphemous entries for the sake of Ramadhan..

To all my Muslim friends and the Muslim brothers and sisters all over the world..

May we all have a peaceful Ramadhan journey.. and may our ibadah be blessed by Allah (swt).

Happy Eid Mubarak!!... :)

MOST IRRITATING!
if u're an ardent reader of my blog, i'm sure u'd know the kind of reality tv freak i really am!... apparently, one of my closest friend - supposedly a reader of my blog, but a not-so-ardent one at that - has irritated the hell out of me!...

the nite was spent with the oh-so-pregnant Ms Sinus and Ms Minah Kawen The 4th together with each of our partners, after the play put up by Kids Inc! from AMP - directed and playwrite by a certain Minah Kental aka the oh-so-pregnant Ms Sinus. Which by the way, is very well delivered by the kids as young as 9yrs old!... *standing ovation*

as were were having our girly talks, moving on to babies' sunat in Islam and then reality TV.. someone juz HAD to open her big, wide, mouth and we couldn't even stop her!!... w/o warning, and dengan selambenye she went....

The winner is "so and so"... *gasps dramatically* Din u guys know it oredi? *look of bewilderment* - quoted by Ms Minah Kawen IV

I shall not even say who's the winner, out of respect for those who are an ardent fan of the show and would like to know who win, by watching it till the end - like moi, i'm sure. But of course, unlike moi, at least you guys would be kept in suspense till someone decides to do it to u too!.. so now that I know, watching the show will never be the same again!... it's sooooo fucking irritating!...

well, Ms Minah Kawen IV, fyi, reality TV freaks would love to watch the show till the end - no matter if it's a delayed telecast, or not!... and tat's y we watch it religiously....

read: religiously ie i'd purposely choose NOT to go out on that day juz becoz i wanna watch the damn show!... and if i really HAVE, HAVE to do it, i'd ask someone to record it juz so i can watch it the very next day!... and i'd NOT even want to know who got eliminated tat week until i freakin watch it!... the ONLY time - i repeat, the ONE and ONLY time - i'd wanna know who got eliminated or wateva, is when i dun manage to watch it!... geddit???

oh god!.. i'm soooooo sore!... oh yeah!... tat's how much of a freak i really am!... i have an emotional attachment to the show and it's contestants of a reality TV if i really, really love it!... and yeah! - that explains my freakiness!... so Ms Minah Kawen IV, the next time, dun rattle off the winner until we ask for it, eh!... brrrrrrrr.......

but also, pls remember, no matter how much i freakin eff you last nite AND in this entry, i'll always love you!!!... hahahhaha... ;) betul! tak bedek! cuma gerrrraaaaaam je!!!.....